tips for a surrogate partner

Tips for a Surrogate Partner

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As a partner to a surrogate mother, you will hear how selfless and generous they are, but you deserve some kudos too! Although the workload is on her, you play an essential role in the entire process. You will serve as a chauffeur, nurse, take on more household or childcare responsibilities, rub tired and sore legs with various other tasks and “favors” that will come your way. Shared Conception wants to give some advice for partners of surrogate mothers.

 

Don’t stop the conversation:

It is important to communicate your needs throughout the journey, not just in the beginning. It’s the best way to overcome any obstacles that your relationship may face during the pregnancy.

 

Stay involved.

 Go to significant doctor appointments, ask, “how are you doing today” – and mean it! You will feel like you are part of the journey when you try. Depending on your level of comfort, it does help to be involved with the intended parents. This relationship is vital to a successful and happy surrogacy. So, stay on that text chain, or join in on that FaceTime call. A little bit of involvement can go a long way.

 

Pause from Intimacy:

Your partner will take fertility medications that can make her pregnant in the blink of an eye. You will have to abstain from sex for a little while during this time and after the transfer. This won’t last forever. Be honest with your partner if there are any intimacy issues in your relationship at this time. Couples tend to be less intimate during pregnancy, and it may feel different knowing your partner is carrying a baby for someone else.

 

Imbalanced Responsibilities: 

Your partner will experience dips in energy and motivation as she gets further along in the pregnancy. You may have to take on more responsibility with life, in general, such as the kids, cleaning, cooking, grocery shopping, etc. If this starts to wear on you, you may all need a break. Always communicate, and it’s okay if you don’t fold the laundry that day….it will be there tomorrow.

 

Reduced Activity: 

Those impromptu bike ride, walks, concerts, weekend getaways may come to a pause, too. But, as mentioned above, it is momentary. Take this opportunity to find something different you can do together. This might be a great way to discover a new hobby or interest.

 

Interested in becoming a surrogate? Give us a call today or visit www.deliveradream.com to fill out an application request form! We would love to hear from you! Shared Conception promises to support you and your partner throughout your journey.

updated terms and definitions

Terms and Definitions – Updated!

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If you are contemplating surrogacy, you will find a world of terms that may sound like a whole new language!  These terms are referred to in surrogacy agencies, clinics and doctors’ offices. It can be confusing and intimidating so Shared Conception has compiled a list of surrogacy terms so you can understand what is being said!

IF– Intended Father

IM– Intended Mother

IP– Intended Parent (some get specific to say IF or IM, but just as easy to say IPs)

FIF– Former Intended Father

FIM– Former Intended Mother

FIP– Former Intended Parents

GC- Gestational Carrier (can also be GS for Gestational Surrogate)

RE- Reproductive Endocrinologist

ET- Embryo Transfer

DE- Donor Egg

ED- Egg Donor

BCP- Birth Control Pills

B/W– Bloodwork

DET- Double embryo transfer (transferring 2 embryos at once)

SET- Single embryo transfer (transferring 1 embryo at transfer)

PIO – Progesterone in oil (typically in injection form for most clinics and protocols)

P4- Progesterone (commonly referred to as this when mentioned results of progesterone levels during monitoring appointments)

E2- Estradiol/Estrogen (commonly referred to as this when mentioned results of estrogen levels during monitoring appointments)

HPT– Home Pregnancy Test

FRER- First Response Early Result (one of the most sensitive tests and often mentioned as a top choice to use if you’re testing early)

POAS– Pee on a stick (use a home pregnancy test)

BFP– “Big Fat Positive” aka positive pregnancy test (BFN if negative, but we don’t want to be negative here and highlight that acronym!)

Beta– hCG blood test for pregnancy

EDD- Estimated due date

U/S- Ultrasound

SCH- Subchorionic hemorrhage (common in IVF and part of why we say don’t jump to conclusions or try to worry about bleeding)

CD- Cycle Day (CD1 is cycle day 1 which is the first full day of your period, which you will share with your coordinator each month prior to transfer)

2WW– Two Week Wait (almost never an actual 2 week wait as many beta tests are done by then)

9dp5dt (you can use a variety of numbers)- You can change the wording, but this means 9 “days past” 5 “day transfer” assuming the embryos were frozen on day 5.

PGD- Preimplantation Genetic Diagnosis

PGS– Preimplantation Genetic Screening

 

The staff at Shared Conception is here to guide you and answer any questions you may have about surrogacy. We want you to be informed, fulfilled and confident about your decision to give or receive the most precious gift there is. Interested in becoming a surrogate or finding a surrogate? Give us a call today. Ladies interested in becoming a surrogate can also visit www.deliveradream.com and fill out an application request form. Potential intended parents can visit www.sharedconception.com to get further information. We would love to hear from you!

 

 

 

repeat surrogacy journeys

Loved it the first time? Repeat Journeys

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Often, after a successful journey that has blossomed into a great friendship, intended parents will come back and ask the same surrogate to enter a second surrogacy arrangement. Shared Conception has seen this scenario occur many times. We also have many surrogates who offer to carry a baby for another couple after a successful first journey.

Did you know that the compensation for first-time surrogates and experienced surrogates are different? If you’ve been a surrogate before, you can expect to get paid more when you embark on a second or third surrogacy journey.

That’s right — experienced surrogate compensation rates are typically higher than women who embark on a journey for the first time. When you are a repeat surrogate, you have already proven your ability to safely carry a gestational pregnancy to term. You have shown that you can successfully partner with intended parents through the length of this process, and you have  knowledge of the surrogacy process which will make another journey much easier. You’ll be in high demand from intended parents who are looking for a surrogate.

Keep in mind: There is also a limit to how many pregnancies you can have as a surrogate. That includes your own pregnancies. Many medical professionals will set that limit at no more than five vaginal births and no more than three cesarean-sections before you carry another surrogacy baby. While having a lengthy pregnancy history can be an advantage for intended parents, it may also increase the likelihood of complications during pregnancy and childbirth. So, every time you decide to become a surrogate, you must again be medically cleared by a fertility specialist to move forward.

Shared Conception pledges to wholeheartedly support you throughout the pregnancy. Our client coordinators will expertly act as a liaison between you and the intended parents and will make sure that everyone has a beautiful journey. Interested in becoming a surrogate? Give us a call today or visit www.deliveradream.com to fill out an application request form!

 

other things to consider about surrogacy

Other things to consider when becoming a surrogate

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At Shared conception, we want our surrogates to be informed about the choices they have when becoming a surrogate. It’s not just about meeting the initial surrogacy requirements. You have control over many other considerations. Here are some things that you may not have thought about, as you approach your journey.

Location

Sometimes a surrogate is matched with intended parents who happen to be in her area or just a short car ride away. However, there are times when the intended parents live in another state, or even a different country. Even though these days it is easier to communicate with platforms like Facebook, Zoom and Skype, the geographic location of the intended parents might be important to you. Shared Conception is happy to discuss this if you are not sure how you feel, or if you prefer one way or the other. Just keep in mind, that any travel arrangements are something we will always assist with and of course they are paid for by the intended parents.

International Intended Parents

Some of our intended parent come to Shared Conception from countries outside of the United States. In this case, the intended parents will travel to the U.S. for the IVF transfer, and most are able to be there for the delivery. Many surrogates and their families find the experience of working with intended parents from other countries a wonderful learning experience.

What kind of relationship do you want?

While there are many legalities and contracts involved in a journey, it is also a personal one. We find that many of our intended parents and surrogates become very close, and sometimes lifelong friends, or even “like family,” staying in touch months or years after the birth. Others prefer to keep it a professional relationship. This is all a matter of personal preference. Relationships happen naturally, but it is easier to match you with likeminded intended parents in the beginning of the process.

Religion and surrogacy

At Shared Conception, our intended parents and surrogates are from all cultures and faiths, and we respect all traditions. We always want to be made aware if personal beliefs will impact our matching process. Remember, this is a very personal journey and we want to ensure that we are taking every consideration into account.

Same-sex couples and surrogacy

As we all know, families come in all shapes and sizes. Shared Conception does assist same-sex couples in extending their families. We find this experience especially rewarding.

We have only scratched the surface here with a few topics that come up in the matching process. Shared Conception pledges to wholeheartedly support you throughout the journey. Why not take the next step and give us a call today or visit www.deliveradream.com to fill out an information request form! We would love to hear from you!

holiday travel

Is Holiday Travel Safe?

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With the lingering pandemic, surrogacy contracts, and the overall stress of travel, is it safe to travel this holiday season while you’re pregnant?

In the past, traveling was basically fine for healthy pregnant women without complications but everything is a bit different now. If you are planning a trip as a surrogate, always make sure you notify your intended parents and most importantly your doctor, to get the green light. You can discuss whether or not your travel is essential or if it’s safer to put it off in order to minimize any health risks.

Of course, the best time to travel is in the second trimester between the 14th and 28th week. This time is often the best because your energy is back, morning sickness (if any) is virtually gone and you can still get around easily. After the second trimester, it tends to become more difficult to move around or sit for long periods of time.

If you are free and clear to travel and thinking about a road trip, consider this:

  • When taking a car trip, keep in mind the shortest route is often the best route.
  • Wear your seat belt at all times. The belt should sit low on your hip bones, below your belly.
  • Plan to make frequent stops. Use these stops to move around and stretch your legs.
  • Wear comfortable shoes, and clothing that is not too tight.
  • Wear a few layers of light clothing that can easily be added or removed.
  • Eat regular meals to boost your energy.
  • Drink extra fluids. Take water with you. You may need to take more restroom breaks—don’t hold it too long.

If you have spoken to your doctor and have the green light to board a plane, consider these tips:

  • Avoid “high touch” areas like escalator railings, elevator buttons or door handles.
  • Wipe down surfaces during your trip like plane armrests and tray tables.
  • Use hand sanitizer and use it after touching common surfaces.
  • Avoid touching your face to decrease risk of contracting any virus.
  • Choose a window seat – there is lesser chance of catching the virus, even if you have to ask the two people next to you to get up so you can use the bathroom!

For more information, visit the COVID-19 travel website of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC): www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-ncov/travelers/index.html. You also can read about COVID-19 and pregnancy at www.acog.org/COVID-pregnancy.

Shared Conception wishes you safe travels and a wonderful holiday season! If you are interested in surrogacy and helping creating a family, give us a call. It’s the best gift you can give this year! Or visit www.deliveradream.com to find out more information!

Becoming a Gestational Carrier

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If you are a woman who wants to be a gestational carrier (or surrogate), you absolutely need to be willing to do the research to consider what you are getting yourself into.

Surrogacy is a life changing venture. It sounds great in theory, but in practice, it really is a huge undertaking. Women who feel compelled to help couples and individuals, sometimes find themselves compromising themselves out of the goodness of their hearts. Below are some common mistakes to avoid. It’s so important to be true to yourself…that is one of the best gifts you can give to your yourself and the Intended Parent(s)!

Research

It’s important to become well-educated about surrogacy before throwing yourself into the surrogacy process. A lot of your time and emotions will be involved. You will also need to consider the impact a journey will have on your family, health, job and overall lifestyle.

Emotional impact

You will want to consider the emotional impact a surrogate may endure. You cannot forget that you are pregnant, but you have to also understand that your intended parents have faced many hardships from pregnancy and fertility. Their emotions can affect you throughout the pregnancy and you do have to deal with their feelings as well.

Pregnancy is not always easy

Many who choose surrogacy decide on it because they like being pregnant. So, naturally you expect your all your pregnancies to go as well as your previous ones. But, that is not a guarantee. Every pregnancy is different. That is why it is so important to have a support system in place; just in case.

Don’t forget to ask questions! That is the beauty of having an agency such as Shared Conception as part of your support system. Never hesitate to ask! We will make sure you are comfortable every step of the way.

Shared Conception pledges to wholeheartedly support you throughout the pregnancy. We want you to be informed, fulfilled and satisfied knowing you contributed to the world in a unique and precious way. Interested in becoming a surrogate? Give us a call today or visit www.deliveradream.com to fill out an application request form! We would love to hear from you!

 

Surrogacy is life changing

Surrogacy is Life-Changing!

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There are many ways that surrogacy will change your life. Some reasons are surprising but nevertheless, all are life changing and impactful for everyone involved.

Adding to your family

For some surrogates, it creates an extended family. Although it may seem like a business transaction at times, it ends up meaning so much more. You often end up creating lifelong friends, but you may never understand the impact you have had on them or the gratitude they have for you.

Seeing the other side of the coin

Most women choose to become surrogates because they enjoy pregnancy and their family and feel compelled to help create a family for someone else. Then there are the special few who become a surrogate multiple times because they had such amazing experiences. As a surrogate, you begin to see a glimpse of those who have struggled with infertility. It’s heart breaking but impactful. Women who have never had trouble conceiving, often have a hard time understanding infertility and the struggles, emotions and heartache involved.

Becoming a good communicator and organizer

Surrogacy is all about communication. There are many cogs in the surrogacy wheel. Communication is an important aspect of your journey as a surrogate. You need to communicate with your intended parents as well as your doctors. The way you feel is important, and you need to report on the way you feel quite often throughout your journey. This ensures a successful and smooth surrogacy. Surrogacy also forces you to become well-organized. There are medication schedules, doctors appointments and more. But, you also have to keep your intended parents apprised. This may instill some good habits that will be hard to break even after the birth.

You learn more about your body

There is a lot required of your body when you are a surrogate. By the end of your journey, you feel like an expert in reproductive health. It takes a lot to become pregnant as a surrogate. There are a lot of people, appointments and medicine involved. You begin to become more in tune with your body’s needs and responses. This will automatically force you into healthier habits – and maintain a healthier lifestyle, even after your journey!

Interested in learning more about surrogacy? Give us a call today or visit www.deliveradream.com and let’s talk!

 

 

 

positive body changes while pregnant

Positive Body Changes in Pregnancy

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Pregnancy brings forth many changes. To your life, your body, your mood, etc. In this article we would like to focus on the positive aspects of change that occur while pregnant. Even as a surrogate, besides helping to create a family, pregnancy brings many other positive changes. Several of those changes are great benefits to your body. The following are some of the top benefits that you may not know.

  • Decreased Menstrual Cramps:Your menstrual cycle should resume after childbirth. And, some women find that they have fewer cramps or their menstrual pain ceases altogether. This pain reduction is a well-known phenomenon, but there is no certainty as to why it occurs. One theory is that childbirth eliminates some of the prostaglandin receptor sites in the uterus. Prostaglandins; hormones that direct the uterus to contract during labor, also play a role in monthly menstrual pain. Fewer pain-receptor sites equal fewer cramps.
  • Lower cancer risk:Pregnancy may be an effective protector against breast and ovarian cancers. The more pregnancies you go through, the greater the effect. In addition, some research has found that breastfeeding (or pumping if you’re a surrogate) for more than three months can also lower your risk of certain cancers.
  • Heightened Senses:Pregnancy seems to enhance your sense of taste and smell. Unfortunately, there are those smells that create nausea in early pregnancy but can also make foods especially tasty and delicious later on. This is credited to higher levels of estrogen.
  • Healthy lifestyle:Pregnancy causes many women to create various kinds of positive health changes and to drop bad habits. These new healthy habits institute a healthier lifestyle that we can hopefully carry out even after birth.
  • Confidence Boost:Did you know that labor and delivery are compared to a marathon? There is a huge sense of accomplishment while pregnant and especially after giving birth. Carrying a child is the ultimate do-it-yourself project that is sure to make any woman proud; not to mention the joy of knowing that as a surrogate, you helped complete a family!

In addition to your own happiness and sense of accomplishment, you are helping create a family, which many others cannot do. You are selfless, special, empowered and you’re giving an incredible gift to a family in need.

Shared Conception pledges to wholeheartedly support you throughout the pregnancy. Interested in becoming a surrogate? Give us a call today or visit www.deliveradream.com to fill out an application request form! We would love to hear from you!

 

 

Women Female support system for surrogacy

Building Your Surrogacy Support System

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A Successful surrogacy is a group effort. It includes cooperation from the surrogate, egg donor, intended parents, nurses, doctors, social workers, attorneys and coordinators. With a similar goal, a successful team is committed to openness, honesty and clear communication.

There is one part of the team that does not get all the attention they deserve. That is your support system. This system is vital and includes spouses, partners, family members and friends who encourage you throughout your journey. So how do you become that exceptional part of a surrogacy support system?

  1. Be aware of surrogacy. Great surrogate candidates have spent a large amount of time researching he process. A great support person has a clear understanding of what the process means and why it is so selfless and life changing.
  2. Open conversations. To be a great supporter, it’s important to communicate with the surrogate about any sensitive subject matter, be a shoulder to cry on in any hormonal or emotional period, or just be someone to talk to.
  3. Intended parents often attend medical appointments with their surrogate and if they live close to each other, they occasionally have lunch or a get together with them. This is also required from a person in the surrogate’s support bubble. If the intended parents cannot make it to the appointments, offering to take your surrogate friend or family member to her appointments can mean a lot to them.
  4. Help out! There are so many ways to do so and it doesn’t necessarily mean you have to clean and endure housework! You can help with any emotional issue, childcare, errands, picking up prescriptions, cooking a meal, or you can get creative and do something like leaving a colorful and supportive message in chalk on her driveway!

These are just some examples of what makes a good support system a GREAT supports system. Feel lucky you were chosen! This is an honor and a wonderful journey to be a part of. You are helping to create a family and helping to give someone a priceless gift. Our surrogacy agency, Shared Conception thanks everyone that has been or will be a part of a support system. We always let our surrogates know that we are a part of that system too and are also honored to be a part of their journey.

Shared Conception pledges to wholeheartedly support our surrogates throughout the pregnancy. Our client coordinators will expertly act as a liaison between you and the intended parents. We will ensure that any sensitive or difficult subject matters are tactfully brought up and handled. We want you to be informed, fulfilled and satisfied knowing you contributed to the world in a unique and precious way. Interested in becoming a surrogate? Give us a call today or visit www.deliveradream.com to fill out an application request form! We would love to hear from you

 

 

why a previous pregnancy to become a surrogate

Now is a great time to apply

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Some of us have had a hard couple of weeks. It’s been scary. Worrying about getting sick, who is around us and our families, having enough food and supplies, is stressing us out. Not to mention not knowing whether or not we will have jobs depending on the industry. Money is going to be tight for all of us, and we would like to offer you a solution.

Shared Conception is a surrogacy agency that helps create families. And we can’t do this without you; our wonderful potential surrogates. The most important quality in a surrogate is her love for being pregnant. All of our surrogates share this similar quality. Many love being pregnant and the joy of surrogacy so much, that they have been a gestational carrier with Shared Conception two, three or even four times!

And yes! You get paid! Now is a great time for that much needed extra income. You and your family will benefit from this selfless act of kindness. You can earn up to $40,000 by helping create a family. It’s a win-win!

You can learn more about How to become a Surrogate in our blogs. Here are some frequently asked questions, answers and links with more information:

  1. How long does it take to become a surrogate with Shared Conception? Read more here. It will walk you through the beginning processes of surrogacy from the preliminary application (which you can fill out here), to the matching process and other required screenings.
  2. What other processes do I have to go through? A medical and psychological evaluation along with a background check is required as well. You can read more about it Don’t be concerned about small infractions such as speeding tickets. This won’t disqualify you from being a surrogate.
  3. What is the IVF medical process like? Read this blog to learn about the IVF transfer, and the protocols for pregnancy and delivery.

Shared Conception pledges wholeheartedly to support you throughout the entire pregnancy, and we will still be there afterwards! Our client coordinators will expertly act as a liaison between you and the intended parents. We will ensure that any sensitive or difficult subject matters are tactfully brought up and handled. We want you to be informed, fulfilled and satisfied knowing that you contributed to the world in a unique and precious way. Interested in becoming a surrogate? Give us a call today or visit www.deliveradream.com to fill out an information request form. We would love to hear from you.