Despite being a rewarding experience for everyone involved, surrogate pregnancy is quite complicated. But being a life-changing decision, there are many factors that the surrogate mother will have to consider. Becoming a surrogate mother can be an emotionally taxing ordeal.
Surrogate-Born Baby- The Emotional Transfer
You don’t need officials at the surrogate agencies to tell you that being a surrogate mother is just like normal pregnancy for a woman. Just as a normal pregnancy, the mother does get attached to the child she’s carrying in her womb.
It is exactly the same for the surrogate mother, who is bound to bond with the child inside her, even if it’s not hers. She cannot emotionally detach herself from the child she’s carrying. It is an incredibly emotional journey.
However, a surrogate mother has to remember not to let this emotional attachment take away the rewarding experience and the happiness she is bringing to a family.
Process of Surrogate Pregnancy- Screening
According to the American Society for Reproductive Medicine, it is important to give the surrogate mother psychological counseling and evaluation.
Surrogacy agencies in Texas and most other states make it a point to facilitate complete mental health evaluation, including PAI or MMPI testing by a psychologist, to protect the mental health of surrogate women.
Some even have designed thorough processes for screening, comprising support groups that meet monthly and offer psychological support. A team of licensed mental health experts conducts necessary training sessions for surrogate women from when their process begins right till two months post-birth.
These psychological support sessions can be helpful because they involve in-depth discussions with surrogate women.
In addition to the screening processes, the requirements of most surrogacy agencies involve the necessity of raising one’s own children. This requirement ensures that the woman is ready to be matched, has a support system in place, has children, and is financially sound.
The screening process also identifies whether a woman who has a history of postpartum depression, has experienced a loss, or is in a grieving state. This way, they are able to identify that she is not an appropriate fit for surrogacy, saving her and the intended future parents from emotional trauma post-delivery.
Attachment Issues- Are they common in pregnancy?
When you’re trying to decide if surrogacy is right for you, you may also wonder about the attachment issues after delivery too. But the good news is that problems with emotional transfers of surrogate-born babies rarely ever arise.
Post-Birth Period- Managing Emotions
Despite having strong reasons to become a surrogate, arranging for a birthing ball or pregnancy ball, and thinking you’re fully prepared mentally, you may have doubts. After you have delivered the surrogate-born baby, returned them to their parents, and resumed normal life with your family, a final question may remain. Will you share an emotional connection even after the transfer?
The answer to this lies in your relationship with the intended parents. If you think you may not cope as well post-delivery with the emotional transfer, you must work on developing an understanding of the IPs. Some are already concerned about how their surrogate will cope and find ways to give her opportunities to spend time with them in the future.
This opportunity can give the mother a window to see the child she birthed growing while knowing that her role has been fulfilled.
Final Thoughts
Emotional transfers are perhaps the most complicated process of surrogate pregnancy. But due to thorough internal screenings and counseling, it is very rare to see surrogate mothers dealing with emotional transfer issues.
Surrogacy is a life-changing decision; if you require additional assistance with deciding if surrogacy is the right journey for you, feel free to reach out to us.