Many gestational surrogates find the experience so rewarding that they are willing to do it more than once. If age and health conditions permit, a second surrogacy can be a wonderful experience. In some cases, the surrogate even acts as a surrogate for the same intended parents, helping them to expand their family.

As surrogates have their own families to take care of, it would be beneficial to evaluate the impact of another pregnancy on your partner and children. Shared Conception does everything it can to make the experience for surrogates and intended parents go as smoothly as possibly, and promises the same caring and attentive treatment the second time around.

Sometimes, the intended parents might choose another surrogate for a second child. The surrogate-intended parent relationship is a strong one, where many surrogates remain close to the intended parents and their families after. While it can feel a little disappointing if the intended parents choose another surrogate, do not forget that you have just given them the gift of life and they’re extremely thankful.

It is good to manage expectations while also keeping lines of communication open. Shared Conception has found that the best surrogacy relationships have trust, communication, appropriate boundaries and flexibility. Because the surrogacy process lasts over a year, it is important to remain flexible in your expectations and understanding of your needs, as well as those of the intended parents during this journey.

As in any relationship, it is healthy to maintain boundaries. The main goal of the surrogacy relationship is to help the intended parents’ family. You may indeed become friends or even a part of the family, developing a wonderful relationship over time! Shared Conception recommendation: take it slow, be warm and authentic and have good boundaries.

You are starting a wonderful journey together—again. Enjoy!

Some of our best surrogates come to us as strong willed single women. These women are single mothers and have a steadfast desire to help others create a family. They are independent, hardworking, and immensely appreciative of family bonds.

A single surrogate is defined as one who is not currently living with or sexually active with any other adult. Those involved in dating situations or other sexually active relationships are still considered “partnered” surrogates even if they are unmarried.

The screening process for a single surrogate differs from that of a partnered surrogate. A single surrogate will attend both screening and match meeting on her own. Shared Conception will contact the person she identifies as her primary support to ensure that they’re able to provide the support the surrogate will need.

We also understand that life happens. While you may be single during your screening and the early stages of your journey, it is entirely possible that you’ll meet someone during your journey.

Dating is allowed during the course of your journey, but you will want to make certain that suitors understand just how important your journey is to you, and that this journey could have implications on your developing relationship.

Shared Conception is happy to talk with you about any potential relationships and ways to discuss your situation with a potential love interest.

Many of our single surrogates tell us that, in certain ways, going the journey alone can feel freeing. Without having a significant other around the house, they tell us they feel able to take time off of housework to just enjoy the pregnancy.

If you’re a single woman considering surrogacy we understand that you may have a great deal of questions. Shared Conception is able to help you navigate this incredible decision and help answer any additional questions you may have. Call us.

The reasons a woman chooses to become a surrogate can be endless. Chances are, if you’re considering making this life changing choice, you’ve already compiled a list of reasons and benefits. Even so, here are nine more benefits to consider; one for each month you’ll be carrying a child.

1. Giving Life. Surrogates are given the chance to give a gift that no one else can. Intended parents turn to surrogacy because they need help conceiving a child. You’ll be chosen to help that couple become a family. You’re the one person who can turn an only child into a brother or a sister. It’s a selfless gift unlike any other, and the sense of accomplishment is a benefit all its own.

2. Financial. Yes, you get paid. While our surrogates agree that financial compensation is not the only reason they choose to become a surrogate, it is indeed a benefit worthy of consideration. Many women use the compensation to put a down payment on a new house, buy a new car, send themselves back to school, or pay off college loans. Others use the funds as the nest egg that allows them to open their own business or even stop working in order to stay at home with their own children.

3. One More Time. Our surrogates tell us they love being pregnant. If you’re like them, you had uncomplicated pregnancies and loved every minute. Even so, your own family might be complete. Becoming a surrogate gives you the benefit of being pregnant one more time.

4. Be a Role Model. Choosing to be a surrogate makes you a stand out figure, not only in your home but also in your community. Earning the respect of your own children and of your peers is indeed a benefit.

5. Global Perspective. Becoming a surrogate will open eyes, both your own and those of people around you. Choosing to walk this road will give you the benefit of perspective. The ability to see life from walks of life very different to your own can be humbling and empowering at the same time.

6. Self Confidence. On delivery day, in the 12th hour, when you hurt and when you just want to go to sleep, something amazing happens. You give birth to a child with no relation to you. You make a family. You change the world. In this moment, your self-confidence soars to heights you never knew possible. You swell with pride and receive a benefit you cannot comprehend until you’ve lived it.

7. A Different Kind of Family. Many intended parents seek to have an emotional bond with their surrogate. Quite a few surrogates report having long lasting bonds with the families they help create. Think of it as an extended family that you get to choose.

8. Health Care. From the moment you become a surrogate you receive access to healthcare. Either through a surrogacy specific plan or your own current health care plan, you will have access to pregnancy related health care at no cost to you.

9. Community. Becoming a Shared Conception surrogate gives you a VIP pass to join the ranks of many other like-minded women. We are a family-oriented and community-minded surrogacy agency.

Whatever reasons you have that have brought you to consider becoming a surrogate, know that you’re already an extraordinary woman. We look forward to having you complete our online initial application and speaking with you about the many tangible and intangible benefits of choosing to become a surrogate. Shared Conception looks forward to hearing from you this new year! Make it an unforgettable 2016!

Would you carry a stranger’s baby? How about your sister’s? Over the last few years, surrogacy has entered our pop culture zeitgeist with celebrities using surrogates to complete their families. But surrogacy remains one of the least talked about tools in the fight against infertility. Why do surrogates do what they do? What do they get out of it? And how hard is it to give a child to its parents after having it in your womb for 9 months? On Christmas Day, here are three women’s stories about their experience with surrogacy. Happy holidays from Shared Conception!
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The hardest part was shouldering the burden of infertility.” – Kymberli Barney, 33, Hinesville, Georgia, married with girl/boy twins, 10, an 8-year-old boy and a 4-year-old daughter

“My husband and I initially had trouble conceiving. Once the problem was figured out I got pregnant easily – and surrogacy was a way of paying it forward because as far as infertility we got off easy. Even as a child, I was fascinated by childbirth and thought about being an obstetrician. I always wanted to be pregnant, and it hurt when it didn’t come easily for me.

When I delivered the baby by surrogate, that was magical. But it wasn’t just one moment. There was the first time my intended mom put her hand on my belly and felt her son move and that look in her eyes. And then the moment of the delivery, when the intended father laid eyes on his son for the first time. I felt like I had really done something that mattered for someone else.”
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“Some people do it for the money…but for me it’s also about the activism.” – Kelly Rummelhart, 36, Gridley, California, married, 9-year-old girl and 7 and 4-year-old boys

I remember in high school I had a friend that was gay and I wondered how he would have a baby. At the same time, a straight couple on “Days of Our Lives” had a baby by surrogate. I thought that was amazing, and I wanted to do that for someone. Then once I had my own kids, I thought how happy I was having my kids and couldn’t imagine what it would be like for someone who couldn’t have babies.

I also knew I wanted to work with a gay couple. Some people do it for the money, or they always wanted to do it, but for me it’s also about the activism. I don’t have a million dollars to donate to specific causes, but I do have a working uterus. I’ve delivered two sets of twins for two gay couples. When others have found out that my couples were gay they haven’t really said anything to my face, but I’m sure there is talk behind my back.

[My first couple] lived only three hours away and wanted me to be a part of their lives, so we see the girls every 8-12 weeks. I remember when I was in the delivery room the first time, and the twins met their Grandma, and she was bawling and hugging me … I was like omigosh. It is so utterly amazing and life altering. It is like being on a drug. Who wouldn’t want to do that again? When my surrogacy agency asked me if I would do this again I said yes. I asked my husband and he said do whatever you want to do. You need [your family’s] support.

The way that I explain it to people is for nine months I’m babysitting. I wouldn’t rub my baby and talk to it the same way. So with my second couple, who didn’t live as close, I would play belly buds and put them on my belly. I had the guys record their favorite songs and play it for their babies. For me, I don’t think there are any worst parts. I had really easy pregnancies!”
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“Giving something is as important as receiving something.” – Natasha Skinner, 37, Annapolis, Maryland, married, 14-year-old son and 11-, 8-, 5- and 2-year-old daughters

I was a surrogate for my sister-in-law, my husband’s brother’s wife. She has cystic fibrosis so she could not carry a child, but they could genetically create a healthy baby with her egg and his sperm.

It was important for my husband that we had family support, especially if I wasn’t feeling well. We already had five kids so if that meant making a meal or driving a kid somewhere, other family members stepped in. My mother-in-law helped tremendously. And my sister-in-law’s family helped, mostly by providing meals or by watching the kids when I went to the grocery store to get food.

The hardest part was the shots. Nobody ever really talks about that. That was a daily thing, twice a day, and they were painful. Also, just not feeling great was hard. With my own pregnancies I felt fine after 13 weeks, but for this one, it was 19 weeks. However, I would do it again if I were younger. But I probably wouldn’t do it for someone who wasn’t a family member. Fortunately for me, it’s my nephew – I can see him and I know how he is doing.

Really the best part was at the end when they received their baby, just to see the joy and happiness. When John and Kelly came in, I thought she was going to faint. You could just see that they were elated. It was very special, and it absolutely brought us closer. Giving something is as important as receiving something.”

Telling your boss that you’re pregnant can be stressful. When the baby you’ll be carrying isn’t your own, telling the boss your big news can seem overwhelming. Depending on your relationship with your boss and the workplace atmosphere, you’ll first need to decide if you’re an early sharer or a late sharer.

If you have an open relationship with your boss and you don’t feel as though the news would be ill received or put you in jeopardy, then sharing news of your surrogacy hopes early may be beneficial. Early sharing inspires open communications and trust while allowing you to be honest with your boss over the upcoming absences you’ll be taking for the transfer and monitoring appointments. Your boss will also be clued in to any tiredness or moodiness that tends to come with early pregnancy.

Many women do not feel comfortable sharing their goals until much later in the process. Some wait until a positive pregnancy test and others wait until the end of the first trimester. Delayed sharing allows you to keep their secret a bit longer in the sad possibility of an early miscarriage. Some women also feel as though their bosses would not authorize time away from work for these important medical procedures. If this is your situation, feel confident knowing you are not required to tell your boss why you’re missing work for medically related absences.

Whenever you choose to tell your boss about your surrogate pregnancy, it is probably best to schedule a time for the conversation in advance. A good call would be a time when this can be a one on one discussion without many distractions. A lunch break or other time when you’re off the clock is probably best.

Be sure to ensure your boss of any intentions you have for time off following the birth and, if you intend to return to work following the birth, ensuring your boss of this intention can help create calm. Finally, ask if he/she has any questions. Giving your boss the opportunity to ask questions about the process and what it means to your job performance is important. Call us at Shared Conception, we are effective, efficient and promise to share lots of successful tips and advice!

Becoming pregnant is a big deal. When pregnancy is achieved through surrogacy it can be an even bigger deal. Despite your unique conception story, you now get to make the first tough decision of the pregnancy; when to tell your friends that someone else is carrying your child! Here’s a look at when many intended parents choose to share their good news.

Early Reporters
Some intended parents feel that sharing the news of a positive pregnancy test early on allows friends and family to share in that initial excitement that they’re experiencing. It can be hard to keep such happy news a secret, especially when the road to pregnancy for most parents via surrogacy has been such a long one. Sharing your news early also entitles you to support early on and perhaps even a bit of empathy over those new emotions and stresses that may be taking a toll on your life already.

Close of the First Trimester
Another common time to share news is at the close of the first trimester. Many intended parents wait until the 12th week of pregnancy as the rate of miscarriage drops dramatically from this point on. Parents in this category generally feel as though withholding the news of a pregnancy until it appears to be very viable enables them a safety net in the unfortunate event of a first trimester miscarriage. Additionally, many parents to be wait until late first trimester genetic tests have been done to share their news. This option allows for some time to keep the news just between yourself and sharing your news with friends and family.

Late Bloomers
Finally, some parents choose to wait to share the news of their pregnancy until late in the third trimester, or even until after the birth. This choice is generally made by parents who are not wanting to face criticism or unsolicited advice during the pregnancy process. A late reveal is an option uniquely available to parents of surrogacy, as a third trimester belly is very hard to hide!

What is important to remember is that there is no singular “right” time for sharing your big news. The right time for one parent may not be ideal at all for another. This announcement is just the first of many new decisions that you’ll need to make from the heart. Let Shared Conception play an integral role in building your family.

The confirmation of a failed embryo transfer can feel devastating. After weeks, sometimes months, of contracts, medications, and monitoring, a negative pregnancy test result often leaves both intended parents and surrogates feeling confused, angry and even a bit hopeless. The good news is that a negative pregnancy test now does NOT mean there won’t be a positive test in your future. While we often won’t have an exact reason as to why your transfer failed, here’s a look at a few common culprits.

Egg and Embryo Quality
Sometimes eggs and embryos that look great on transfer day fail to divide and multiply properly once inside the surrogate’s uterus. Most IVF doctors use an Embryo grading system based on factors such as symmetrical cell structure, large inner cell mass, and evidence of as few fractions as possible in the cells to determine the quality of the embryo. However, even embryos with a high grading may fail to result in a positive pregnancy test. Occasionally genetic defects in the developing embryo are also believed to play a part in a failed transfer.

Sperm Quality
Occasionally a sperm head can contain abnormal DNA. If the sperm used to fertilize the egg does not have competent DNA, the embryo may fail to divide properly leading to a negative pregnancy result. Factors known to have an impact on sperm quality include exposure to chemicals and tobacco use.

The Uterine Lining
A thin endometrium (uterine) lining is a leading cause for failed transfer in all IVF transfers. The surrogate will be monitored closely in the weeks preceding transfer in order to ensure that her lining is thickening nicely. In most cases medication protocol can be altered to try and thicken the lining. If an optimum lining cannot be reached the transfer may be cancelled, or potentially unsuccessful if completed.

In most cases the exact cause for a failed transfer will remain unclear. However, the success rates of second transfers are generally much higher than those of first transfers. Your doctor will work with you and your surrogate to make the changes that are most likely to result in a positive pregnancy on your next cycle. Call us here at Shared Conception, we are adept in handling this phase in the pursuit of building your family.

While some parents will openly seek and try to achieve a multiple pregnancy, the news that your surrogate has been confirmed with more than one fetus can come as a surprise. In the rare instance that your surrogate becomes pregnant with triplets or other high order multiples the news can be immensely overwhelming. Whether achieved intentionally or not, the news of a multiple pregnancy can be equal parts exciting and terrifying.

Typically when a multiple pregnancy is confirmed, Shared Conception will reach out to both you and your surrogate to offer educational and emotional support. Keep in mind that she is likely dealing with many emotions of her own centering around the realization that her body is carrying multiple fetuses and how that will impact her life and that of her family.

From time to time it may be important to schedule a consultation with a high risk pregnancy physician. Our surrogacy agency is happy to refer you to someone for this consultation. This person will be able to help you sort through the potential risks of continuing a multiple pregnancy and whether or not a reduction is something you should consider.

In the event that a reduction is needed or desired, Shared Conception will walk you through what will happen and when. Our agencywill also be responsible for speaking with your surrogate about the procedure and ensuring that she has everything she needs in order to navigate the weeks ahead.

Shared Conception understands the wide range of emotions that come with that first ultrasound and are always ready to help you. Our surrogacy agency  has a wealth of information and support is available to you at all times.