Infertility rates are increasing with each passing year. Coupled with this medical hurdle, numerous same-sex couples are yearning to become mothers and fathers. Gay men in particular, look to surrogates so they can build the family they dreamed of always having.

High profile celebrities have emerged, sharing their surrogacy success stories, giving so many individuals the tangible hope of becoming parents one day.

One star to share her surrogacy news is Jordana Brewster of “Fast and Furious.” While beaming with motherhood pride, Brewster said that surrogacy was taking a step towards faith and confidence.

“I couldn’t carry a baby,” she said. “It (surrogacy) taught me a lot to have to rely on someone else to carry my baby for me, because I’m such a private and self-sufficient person. It’s the most intimate leap of faith and trust you can take.” 

Brewster’s surrogate gave birth to her son, Julian, last year.

Surrogacy is enabling couples struggling with infertility the ability to have their own children with a genetic link through in vitro fertilization. In the same breath, surrogates empower women who are unable to carry their own baby.

Yes, surrogate mothers who are fueled by compassion, empower future intended mothers. Women choosing the surrogate journey learn that motherhood may not be the way they intended, but through surrogacy, they can ultimately have their baby. Above all, they can be in control of their destiny. And this realization is utterly profound for a woman who has struggled for years with her own fertility challenges.

For those who have yearned to have a baby without being able to conceive, surrogacy is oftentimes described as a “miracle arrangement,” because surrogates give a special gift each and every day. These selfless women help create “parenthood dreams” for so many couples while their benevolence is highlighted by a lifetime of memories for future parents.

For compassionate women wanting to learn more about surrogacy, contact our team of experts at Shared Conception. We can help you.

Reporter, Paul Swiech, interviewed Allie Ruff, 29, who became a mother to a baby girl via surrogacy in late August 2016. Ruff was diagnosed with invasive ductal carcinoma after discovering a lump. She and her husband, Dave, were married only a year at the time.

Faced with immediate healthcare decisions to make, Ruff realized that her treatments, which would include chemotherapy, could trigger infertility. The couple opted to undergo “fertility rescue” and Ruff underwent treatment so her eggs could be harvested. Sweich reported the couple decided to have their embryos frozen. 

Following Ruff’s surgeries, treatments and current medication protocol, the couple decided that surrogacy was the best option. What they hadn’t anticipated were the high costs.  

At work one day, Ruff’s co-worker, Josie Wiles, learned of her dilemma. Already a mother of three, Wiles offered to be her altruistic surrogate.   Medical appointments, counseling and then legal contracts ensued. 

When Wiles decided to help, her husband and family also supported her decision. After Wiles gave birth to her intended parents’ baby, Ava Jo, she said something that all surrogates agree is the most memorable part of the surrogacy journey.    

“Seeing Allie’s and Dave’s faces the first time they saw her (Ava Jo), that was priceless,” Wiles said. “To see that look on someone’s face when they meet their baby for the first time, that was awesome for me.”

Surrogates have the power to help individuals or couples experience the love of a child. Infertility can affect someone for a variety of reasons. In this heartfelt story, it was breast cancer that affected this cancer survivor’s fertility.  Our surrogacy agency, Shared Conception,  is ready to handle most situations.  We are experts in the field of surrogacy and know how to manage the most vulnerable of circumstances.  

By healing the emotional wounds of infertility, surrogates can afford so many individuals and couples with a sense of renewed hope and brighter outlook for happier days in having a family to call their own.  Our surrogacy agency, Shared Conception, is here to walk this unforgettable journey with you. Call us today.

While the holidays have officially come to a close (we included Valentine's Day!), there may be individuals or couples out there that are relieved to know it’s all over.  For those who have struggled from years of infertility, being childless during the holidays can serve as a constant reminder of their situation and heighten their sadness. 

Family gatherings can be stressful enough, and for those unable to have a child, dodging or answering “family-building questions” may have triggered tension and sorrow. A pang of emotional pain could have emerged at the sound of children laughing or at the sight of them scampering.

Those who encountered challenges reproducing do admit that when they were ready to start a family, they thought having and raising the baby would be the hard part, not conceiving. 

Individuals battling infertility are not alone.  According to recent statistics, 10 to 15 percent of couples living in the United States have been diagnosed with this disease. Compound this with couples and individuals around the globe suffering from infertility and those numbers sharply escalate. Yes, while fertility therapies may work for some, not everyone will respond to the treatments. 

Despite the obstacles, it’s important to never lose hope. 

Never forget, if one road doesn’t bring about the birth of a child, another will. And a very special way is through surrogacy.

In addition to those dealing with their fertility challenges, there are also gay men who rely on surrogacy and egg donation so that they can achieve their dreams of fatherhood. Individuals and couples deciding on surrogacy undeniably share a common thread of compassion. Intended parents empathize with others going through the very same thing.  

While it’s a different pace for all, intended parents arrive at a point in their lives when recognizing that their future family is within their reach through surrogacy. They have endured so much to have their baby. Coupled with their compassion, intended parents redefine the meaning of appreciation and patience. 

Over time, they have come to realize that anything worth the wait is worth waiting for. And that way is through surrogacy.   Give us a call at Shared Conception, we can help you. 

When an individual or couple considers surrogacy to build a family, it’s something they have thought about for quite some time. It’s a decision not made in haste but instead with mindfulness.

Surrogacy makes parenthood dreams come true for those who have battled infertility or for same-sex couples requiring a surrogate to become parents. Advanced reproductive technologies have made it possible for everyone to experience the love of a child. When an individual or couple begins to explore a surrogacy journey at a reputable agency, there are inevitably some initial questions they have early on in the process.

Some intended parents may choose to perform their surrogacy on their own; however, others may find that working with a surrogacy agency in good standing (such as Shared Conception) is a better option for them.

While it’s a personal decision, those who ultimately choose to team up with an agency do so for the following reasons: 

· A streamlined surrogate selection process

· A comprehensive background screening on the potential surrogate (and her partner, if applicable)

· A psychological and medical evaluation for the potential surrogate after the match is made

· Access to top fertility clinics and comprehensive screenings

· Referrals to leading attorneys specializing in surrogacy and right of parentage

· Assistance in navigating the surrogacy process

While finding the right surrogacy agency is the first step, future parents want to know how surrogates are ultimately selected. Prior to a woman filling out a surrogate application, there are requirements mandated by an agency.

A handful of these requirements may consist of the following: 

· Applicants must fall between 21 to 39 years of age

· Applicants must have had given birth to at least one child without complications

· Applicants must maintain a healthy lifestyle and BMI (body mass index) below 32

· Applicants must be nonsmokers and not involved in recreational drug activity

· Surrogacy agencies in the USA require that applicants are citizens of the USA or have proof of permanent residency status in the states

· Applicants do not have a history mental illness

· Applicants are financially secure

If a woman decides she meets the above guidelines, she can move forward filling out an online application and also submitting photos of herself. Some pre-applicants may choose to contact a surrogacy admissions team member at an agency to ask some questions before submitting their applications. Nevertheless, applicants soon discover that reputable agencies, such as Shared Conception , have a rigorous screening process.

So do all applicants become surrogates? That answer is a resounding NO. At top tier agencies, it’s estimated that only 20 percent of applications are approved.

For those applicants who move on to the next stage, intended parents would be happy to know that the next step is an interview with a surrogacy admissions team member at an agency. While the interview is meant to answer an applicant’s questions, it also serves as an opportunity for an agency to take part in additional screening. The interview generally lasts around an hour and can be done via phone or Skype. For those who live in close proximity of the agency, in-person appointments can also be arranged.

If a surrogacy intake team member believes the applicant is a superb surrogate candidate, they will ask her to fill out her post interview packet. Upon completion, she can be deemed as an “available surrogate.”

It’s at this point where intended parents can research the potential surrogate. Once a surrogate match is made, parenthood dreams can begin to come true. Shared Conceptions is ready to help you! Let's go!

One of the biggest challenges intended parents face, having made the decision to build their family with the help of a surrogate, is choosing the right surrogacy program or agency to assist them. Choosing a program you can fully trust can mean the difference between a professional, enjoyable, smooth process and one that is not only stressful, but possibly lengthy and unsuccessful.

Know What Services Are Included

When engaging your chosen surrogacy agency, make sure you clearly understand exactly what services are included in their program and what services they can not help you with, as well as how much those additional services may cost that you will need from other essential service providers. If the surrogacy agency does not handle every step of the process, will they assist you in locating and connecting with all the outside services you will need — from beginning to end? Or are you expected to rely on your own devices to find the right lawyer, the right escrow manager, and take the right steps to obtain legal recognition as the parent(s)?

Some surrogacy agencies charge a premium for their matching services, yet provide no other support or services at all — and may not make that clear to you at the outset. Do your research!

Does the agency have a reputation for following best practices?

A critical question is: Are the surrogates fully pre-screened prior to matching? There are surrogacy agencies that do not properly screen surrogates before matching them with intended parents. Without proper and adequate screening, matches frequently fall apart, leading to heartache for all involved, as well as lost time and money. Similarly, there are agencies that may do all the pre-screening, but will not be available when you or your surrogate needs them throughout the process. You want to be able to rely on your chosen agency to assist you in a timely manner no matter what may arise. Ideally, you should work with an agency that offers a comprehensive surrogacy program with a staff that is not only experienced and sensitive, but is truly caring, and hands-on — one that will serve as your trusted guide through every step on the way to parenthood.

Transparency is vital

Financial transparency is a critical issue when working with a surrogacy agency. If you find yourself confused by an agency's pricing structure, you are not alone. Trying to sort out exactly what each agency offers and what they will charge over the course of a surrogacy is often confusing for intended parents. It is critical that you get accurate information in order to make an educated decision and, in the long run, to feel well represented. If you dig into the pricing by asking for specific details about what is included in the anticipated expenses and fees for the surrogate, you should be able to uncover and compare the true amounts for each agency. If it is hard to get this information that is a warning sign that you should not consider working with a particular agency.

Are they open about their surrogate screening process?

What do they look for in potential surrogates? Do they do background / criminal checks? How selective are they? Do they recruit their own surrogates or use an outside source? A respectable, legitimate surrogacy agency will share these details with intended parents, and most important of all — they will be clear about the process.

Before you are able to move forward, you need to feel comfortable that the agency you’ve chosen is a good one. One that can answer all of your questions and guide you every step of the way, from beginning to baby. At Shared Conception, we stress the importance of choosing a top-notch agency, whether you elect to work with us or one of our colleagues, to ensure the smoothest, most enjoyable journey possible.

There are many things to do when preparing for the delivery of your child (or children). After being through a hopefully wonderful journey with your surrogate, how do you prepare for delivery? Let’s start by taking a tour of the hospital. All hospitals are different and offer different amenities. This is very important for both the Intended Parents and surrogates. It can also put parents at ease so they feel more comfortable when it comes time for delivery.

Here are some suggestions to help reduce the stress of the big day and make you feel better prepared:

Pack a bag for the hospital. Do not pack last minute. This will induce stress. Although there is no guarantee of when your newborn will enter the world, packing a couple weeks before the due date will prevent throwing clothes and “stuff” in a bag last minute. Stay comfortable and warm as hospitals tend to be on the cold side. And don’t forget that phone charger. You will most likely be taking endless amounts of photos and videos to show off your newest addition!

Most important, make copies of and bring all your necessary paperwork. Your surrogate is responsible for taking her medical and legal paperwork, but it does not hurt to take a copy of the parentage order / pre-birth order and your surrogacy contract.

Snacks are important; you never know how long you will be in labor and delivery, so it is a good idea to stay properly fueled throughout a possibly long day or night. This brings us to our next suggestion; take something to do…have some movies or shows downloaded on your iPad, create a good playlist of uplifting positive tunes, get a little creative with an adult coloring book or bring a deck of cards.

Preparing for delivery may seem a bit overwhelming, but it is essential for a smooth, stress-free delivery.

The big day has arrived! No matter if you go into labor on your own, or as a planned induction, delivering your “SurroBabe” is a big day! Most surrogates tell us that, no matter how many times they’ve given birth before, it’s always a bit overwhelming when it comes time to pack your hospital bag for this delivery. Let’s take a look at what goes into the surrogates hospital bag.

First of all, take a deep breath. You’ve done this before, and for the most part you know what to expect. We get it though, this is your FIRST surrogate birth. It just feels different, new. It might make things easier if you start your packing by breaking down your list into two parts: labor & delivery and recovery.

Surrogates Hospital Bag: Labor & Delivery

Start with the big things: your insurance card, identification, and legal paperwork. It’s not a bad idea to have a photocopy of your driver’s license in your hospital bag, in case you forget to grab your purse in the rush to get to the hospital. Having these items accounted for, and at a hand’s reach, can streamline your admissions process.

Next, make sure to have your legal paperwork handy. Your hospital will likely already have copies of your contract and, if applicable, your pre-birth order on file before you arrive. However, it’s always better to have too much information than too little. It’s possible that this unique birth story will lead to confusion over parentage, and having these documents that are legally binding and notarized an help establish your case and clear up any potential miscommunications.

Now that the big things are out of the way, think about your comfort. Just like with your own labor process, you’ll find that you likely want to have several items nearby to keep you comfortable Things like a bathrobe, slippers, or your own pillow can really make your labor process much more comfortable. You could also consider crossword puzzles, a book or an iPad, or even an iPod to play music and pass the time.

Another thing to consider- a lot of surrogates opt to deliver their surrogate baby in an aftermarket labor gown, as opposed to the hospital issued gown. Hospital gowns are famous for fitting badly, and leaving patients over exposed at the worst moments possible. For modesty reasons, many surrogates find that after-market gowns offer more discretion. If you want to plan to wear an after-market gown, check with your hospital first to make sure it’s allowed, and then make sure the gown makes it into your bag.

Finally, you may want to pack a small toiletries bag. Packing eye glasses or contact lens solution as well as a toothbrush can help you feel fresh through the process. Other surrogates bring extra hair ties, lip gloss, and a hairbrush. Others find that they want their own shampoo and conditioners, deodorant, and makeup for the day after delivery.

After the Birth

Depending on the policy at the hospital where you deliver, you’ll be spending anywhere between 24 to 72 hours in the hospital after the birth. You’ll likely begin producing milk during this period, and will want to pack accordingly, especially if you plan to pump breastmilk for the baby. Make sure you pack nursing bras or bras without underwires to help with the pain associated with milk production, as well as breast pads to help with any potential leaks. Many surrogates also pack a nipple ointment or Lanolin as well.

You may also want to bring your camera along. Of course you’ll need to ask permission first, but this may be your last shot to get great photos of the family you helped to create. Snapping a few photos now can help with your post belly life in a few weeks as you adjust to not being pregnant. This can also be a great way to help your own children gain closure.

Finally, think about comfort. You may find that, while the hospital often provides undergarments to you, that you’re more comfortable using familiar items from home. This can include everything from your own underwear to a preferred brand of pad. It’s also nice to splurge on some new loungewear for around the room. Choose loose fitting garments that will be comfortable. Of course, please know that our surrogacy agency, Shared Conception, is here for you from start to finish.  We will do our best to ensure that the totality of your surrogacy experience is positively memorable. Give us a call today to learn more about becoming a surrogate!

While a surrogate may not necessarily have post-partum depression, giving birth is still an incredibly turbulent, emotional time, and this can be amplified by the situation. Surrogates will likely tell you there are a multitude of reasons why they’re not feeling their usual selves post-birth, and generally, it has nothing to do with giving the baby to the parent(s).

Here are a few common reasons a surrogate may be feeling blue:

Contact with the parent(s) has dropped off after the birth. Toward the end of a surrogate pregnancy, there is an insane amount of excitement, a flurry of activity as everyone prepares for the birth, and the surrogate is usually in frequent contact with the parent(s) nearing the end. In some cases, every day. After the birth, the parent or parents are usually adjusting to having a baby in the house for the first time, or a new addition to their family. This usually means they can’t keep up the level of contact they had before the birth, and it tends to drop off. Sometimes this drop-off is permanent, other times it’s merely temporary. Usually, she’s not getting as much contact as she did right before the birth, but that is incredibly situational, and depends on the surrogate and IP(s). Logically, the surrogate understands and acknowledges the reason for the decline, but it can still be a little much to absorb when they have such a rush of hormones going through their bodies.

Going through postpartum recovery with no baby. This has more to do with not having that cute and cuddly distraction on hand to keep her mind off the pain and helping move forward with her daily routine. Another common misconception is that recovery should be easier without a baby around, because, well, they don’t have a baby to take care of! In some ways this may be true, (no crying in the middle of the night for a diaper change), but for the most part it isn’t. Her body is still in major recovery mode, either from a vaginal birth or C-section, and it still takes the same amount of time for that recovery to happen. Some surrogates will feel like major slackers because they don’t have the added responsibility of taking care of a baby, and will get a little sad when they can’t keep up with day-to-day living. They might even push themselves to do too much, too soon, because people know she doesn’t have the baby, and she feels the need to meet their expectations.

Feeling less attractive, physically. No one thinks twice, or at least no one with any sense, about how a woman’s body looks after she’s given birth. The testament to her hard work and weight gain is staring at you, with the most adorable cheeks in the cutest onesie this side of the Earth. For surrogates, however, this isn’t the case, and it can be somewhat intimidating to go out in public with our post-baby bodies with no proof of how we achieved them. Even family or work functions can have this effect, because for some reason there are people who believe that, because the baby isn’t hers, the last nine months of baby body should magically disappear. Unfortunately, this isn’t the case.

Loss of identity. This one is generally the most bittersweet of all because a surrogate is faced with the fact that her part in the journey is, essentially, over. Yes, there is usually contact, visits, pictures, updates, and so on, but her part in the orchestration of creating life is finished. It’s the ending of a chapter, and any future chapters will see her playing a much more minor role than before. Think along the lines of a child leaving home to set out on their own, being independent of their parent(s), and it is somewhat close to that.

Shared Conception gets it. We understand all of the above-mentioned emotions and are ready to walk our surrogates through it all. Give us a call today and learn about surrogacy.