what to look for in a surrogate mother

What to look for in a Surrogate Mother

There is a lot to consider after making the final decision to use a surrogate. Shared Conception works effortlessly to match you with your most perfect surrogate. Your relationship with your surrogate will be unique and can provide you with the most rewarding outcome. When meeting with potential surrogates, what qualities should you look for in a surrogate mother?

Your average surrogate is a generous and caring woman who values family and has a desire to give the gift of a child and help create a family. Surrogates come from many walks of life. All have had at least one child, most come from medium-income households, and are either single or married. Education levels vary.

Of course you want your surrogate to be healthy and have a lifestyle free from drug/alcohol abuse and smoking. Doctors will require an appropriate Body Mass Index (BMI) and that she has had at least one (uncomplicated) pregnancy. Those are just some of the medical requirements. There are also other requirements such as: What are her feelings towards the important issues that may come up during the surrogacy journey, and do they align with yours? How many times is she willing to go through IVF? Does their spouse, friends and family support them?

Choosing the right surrogate is crucial. The most important advice we can give Intended Parents, is to go with your gut. If you have any reservations – feel free to express your feelings to us and we can introduce you to other surrogates. Give us a call today to set up a free consultation. We will guide you the whole way through!

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Questions to Ask a Gestational Carrier

Interviewing potential surrogates is part of the selection process. There are a lot of emotions involved; anxiety, stress, excitement and hope. But, what questions do you ask a woman who will potentially be carrying your baby? At Shared Conception, we do not rest until you find a surrogate you are confident and happy with. It is important to like each other and feel you can get along, but there are some critical questions to ask before choosing a surrogate.

Questionnaire: Getting to know your surrogate

  • How many children do you have?
  • How were your previous pregnancies?
  • Do you want to have more children?
  • How long have you been married?
  • Why did you decide to become a surrogate?
  • How does your family feel about you being a surrogate?
  • Describe a typical day for you.
  • Do you have a health or exercise routine?
  • Have you ever had a miscarriage?
  • How many embryos do you feel comfortable with implanting?
  • How do you feel about selective reduction and termination?
  • Do you feel comfortable with us (the Intended Parents) attending your appointments?
  • What kind of contact would you like after birth?
  • How do you feel about pumping breast milk?

If you have strong religious beliefs, eat organically and prefer your surrogate to do the same, make sure you include these questions that may affect your choice in a surrogate, especially deal-breakers.

With Shared Conception, you are not in this process alone. We do our best to guide you to your best possible match for the best possible outcome; a precious child of your own!

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Becoming a Surrogate: Tips for a successful experience

Finding Intended Parents with Shared Conception is the first step to having the perfect match and the best surrogacy experience possible. After you complete your surrogacy profile, Shared Conception will find potential Intended Parents for you to meet. The next step is the initial conversation, usually done over the phone or via Skype. For many surrogates, this initial conversation may give you that gut feeling that you want when finding the perfect match for you.But, what do you ask a potential Intended Parent? You want to find a connection before getting into the personal details and hard to ask questions such as, “how do you feel about selective reduction?”. Below is a list of questions that may help guide you in conversation with possible Intended Parents.

  • What brought you to pursue surrogacy?
  • What clinic you want to use?
  • When do you hope to start the surrogacy process?
  • How many transfers will you attempt to achieve a pregnancy? Do you have frozen embryos or are you doing a retrieval first?
  • What will you ask of me during the pregnancy? Any food/diet/religious restrictions?
  • What are you most looking forward to about being parents?
  • What type of contact do you want to have after delivery?
  • How many embryos do you intend to transfer?
  • Do you have support from friends and family?
  • Do you plan to be open about the process with those close to you?
  • What would you do if the baby was diagnosed with a medical condition during pregnancy (terminate or continue the pregnancy?)
  • What would you do if you got pregnant with three or more babies (selectively reduce or carry)?
  • What type of contact do you want during the pregnancy? Do you prefer calls, email, text, etc.?

Make sure you are prepared to answer questions about your views and opinions on the surrogacy process as well. Remember, you choose Intended Parents as much as they choose you. If you don’t feel comfortable, don’t choose them. And always go with your gut.

questions to ask your potential surrogate

Questions to Ask Your Potential Surrogate

Interviewing potential surrogates is part of the selection process. There are a lot of emotions involved; anxiety, stress, excitement and hope. But, what questions do you ask a woman who will potentially be carrying your baby? At Shared Conception, we do not rest until you find a surrogate you are confident and happy with. It is important to like each other and feel you can get along, but there are some critical questions to ask before choosing a surrogate.

Questionnaire: Getting to know your surrogate

  • How many children do you have?
  • How were your previous pregnancies?
  • Do you want to have more children?
  • How long have you been married?
  • Why did you decide to become a surrogate?
  • How does your family feel about you being a surrogate?
  • Describe a typical day for you.
  • Do you have a health or exercise routine?
  • Have you ever had a miscarriage?
  • How many embryos do you feel comfortable with implanting?
  • How do you feel about selective reduction and termination?
  • Do you feel comfortable with us (the Intended Parents) attending your appointments?
  • What kind of contact would you like after birth?
  • How do you feel about pumping breast milk?

If you have strong religious beliefs, eat organically and prefer your surrogate to do the same, make sure you include these questions that may affect your choice in a surrogate, especially deal-breakers.

With Shared Conception, you are not in this process alone. We do our best to guide you to your best possible match for the best possible outcome; a precious child of your own!

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Surrogacy and Medications

There are quite a few medications involved for a gestational carrier cycle. When pregnancy occurs naturally, the body produces a number of hormones that prepare the uterus for pregnancy, and help the embryo grow and develop. For a surrogate to have a successful IVF transfer, the process is recreated using the medications listed below.

Doxycycline – this is an antibiotic that fights bacteria in the body. This drug may be prescribed early in your journey to prevent or treat any existing infections. This medicine is generally taken orally; possibly before and after the transfer.

Estrogen – the ovary produces this hormone during a natural cycle. It thickens the lining of the uterus, which is extremely important for a successful transfer. This medication is usually administered by mouth or in a form of a patch. You begin this medicine before the transfer and usually continue throughout the first trimester.

Progesterone – this hormone is also produced by the ovaries but after ovulation. This medicine works alongside the estrogen medication, to prepare the uterus for the embryo to implant. This medicine is administered through intramuscular injections.

Prenatal Vitamins – doctors encourage surrogates to begin prenatal vitamins before the transfer and throughout the pregnancy. These vitamins make certain that surrogate and baby are getting adequate nutrients and also promote healthy development for the baby.

Each gestational carrier responds to these medicines differently so individual protocols vary. Always consult your doctor regarding questions, side effects or administration of these medications. A healthy diet and low impact to moderate exercise, is also extremely important to maintain a healthy and happy journey.

Do you have questions or want to find out more about the surrogacy process? We’d love to help answer any questions you may have. Connect with us at Shared Conception!

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Tips about Shipping Breast Milk

 

If you have opted to pump breast milk for your surrogate baby, you may come across a time where you have to ship your breast milk. Here are some tips to successfully and safely ship breast milk. 

Store your breast milk in quality storage bags. Make sure they are tightly sealed and press as much air possible out of them when sealing.

There are various ways of shipping milk. What is most important, is that the milk is packaged well. First, make sure you have a proper carrier. If you choose to use a Styrofoam cooler, make sure it is at least 2” thick and then place it in a cardboard box, lined with newspaper. With our experience, an insulated cooler is the best but can raise shipping fees because of its weight.

You can use dry ice to ship the milk, but milk will stay frozen without dry ice, as long as it is packaged correctly. Deep-freezing breast milk will make it stay frozen longer. Layer the bottom of your carrier with dry ice and remember to use gloves to avoid being burned. Then place several layers of newspaper on top of the dry ice.

Pack your breast milk in plastic zip lock bags. In case there is a leak, the plastic zip-locked bags will keep the milk contained. To prevent the dry ice from coming in contact with the breast milk bags, wrap the bags in newspaper.

Place a few more layers of newspaper on top of your bagged breast milk and add more dry ice. Poke some holes in the Styrofoam cooler. Dry ice needs to vent or the cooler may break open.

If there is any more room in the box, add more newspaper to keep items from shifting. Close the box and securely tape it closed. Check with your carrier. Labels such as Human Milk, Fragile and/or Perishable may be added to your shipping slip.

Please notify the recipient that there is dry ice in the box to prevent injury.

If you have further questions about this process, contact Shared Conception anytime!

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Common Causes of Male Infertility?

Infertility affects us all, even men! Most likely, after or during the process that the woman is examined and diagnosed, her partner will be looked at by a male fertility doctor. Just like reproductive doctors for women, male fertility doctors try to improve fertility by either correcting a known or diagnosed problem, or suggest treatments that may be helpful. Often, an exact problem or reason cannot be identified. Even if the cause isn’t clear, your doctor may be able to recommend treatments. There are a variety of treatment options for male infertility. Listed below are some that are most common.

Surgery
For example, a varicocele, which is a mass of varicose veins in the spermatic cord, can either be surgically corrected or a blocked duct can be repaired. Vasectomies can be surgically reversed. In cases where little to no sperm are present in the ejaculate, sperm may often be retrieved from the testicles or epididymis, an elongated, cordlike structure along the posterior border of the testis, whose coiled duct provides for the storage, transport, and maturation of sperm.

Treatment of infections
The use of antibiotics may cure an infection of the reproductive tract and improve sperm production or sperm health. This does not always restore fertility, but there is still a possibility sperm may still be retrieved.

Hormone treatments and medications
Hormone replacement therapy may be recommended or medications prescribed, in cases where infertility is caused by high or low levels of certain hormones or problems with the way the body uses hormones.

Assisted reproductive technology (ART)
ART treatments involve obtaining sperm through different methods. Depending on your specific case, prior infertility treatments and wishes, the sperm is then inserted into the female genital tract, or used to perform in vitro fertilization.

In the event that a couple cannot conceive on there own, your doctor may suggest that you and your partner consider either adoption or surrogacy and may even refer you to an agency such as Shared Conception. We are here to assist you.

*references: http://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/low-sperm-count/basics/treatment/con-20033441

PostPartum

Helping a Friend or Family Member Post Surrogacy

As a surrogate, all the months of effort and sacrifice are paid off when you see the Intended Parents hold that baby (or babies) for the first time. Every surrogate has a different journey full of ups and downs. When their journey comes to an end, she may have a feeling or sense of loss. This rarely involves the process of handing the baby to Intended Parents. It’s just an emotional end to a long and tiring journey.

Some women have a higher risk of postpartum depression. Others will get a short stint of baby blues and some will not be affected at all. As a friend or family member, the most important help you can give, is to support your loved one and watch for signs and symptoms of depression.

Symptoms include:

Feeling Overwhelmed. Baby blues are a normal feeling after birth. If you notice your loved one crying a lot and seems to feel down on themselves, this may be one of the first signs of postpartum depression.

Lack of Interest in the activities they usually enjoy. Lack of affection when your loved one is normally affectionate, loss of appetite for a foodie and overall changes in mood is another symptom of PPD.

Trouble with making decisions. If you notice your loved one having a hard time making decisions whether it is due to fatigue or lack of motivation, consider this a sign of PPD.

Lack of sleep or change in sleep patterns. Healing after birth takes time. If you find your partner restless at night or sleeping all the time, this can be related to PPD.

Easily Irritated. No patience? Easily annoyed? If you sense resentment from your partner or friend, consider having them speak to their doctor to get proper treatment.

Post-delivery can be stressful for your loved one, even without bringing home a baby. Keep in mind, they may be afraid or ashamed to admit so but with love and encouragement, you can help.

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Surrogacy in other Countries

In the past years, surrogacy has become more popular and accepting within the United States. Even many celebrities such as Jimmy Fallon, Elton John and Nicole Kidman have been open about how they started their families. Recently, there has been an increase in surrogacy for international couples, which leads us to think, what is surrogacy like in other countries?

While laws in the United States vary from state to state, other countries only allow certain types of surrogacy. Countries such as Spain, the UK and China only allow Altruistic Surrogacy that is when the surrogate receives nothing more than the allowable expenses and does not benefit financially. In Germany, Italy and France, surrogacy in any form is entirely banned.

In the UK and Thailand, gestational carriers are viewed as the legal mother. In India the Intended parents are seen as the legal parents. Some countries do not have any laws or regulations concerning surrogacy. This can cause many problems for the surrogate and the Intended Parents. That country or state will not enforce the surrogacy contract or the Intended Parents may not be recognized as the child’s legal guardians or listed as the birth parents.

Surrogacy has spurred debate in many governments for years. In many places, this topic is debated amongst religious conservatives, feminists and LGBTQ activists. But as history suggests, banning surrogacy will not end it.

There are many complex legal issues when it comes to surrogacy. That’s why most couples seeking a surrogate choose to work with an agency. At Shared Conception, we pride ourselves on our expertise making your precious journey an easy one. Contact our reputable agency for more insight into this process.

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How Intended Parents Find Surrogate Mothers

Many couples that have struggled with infertility have experienced heartbreak time after time, have come to us in search of a Gestational Carrier. Together, Shared Conception works with the Intended Parent(s) to find the perfect match and will take you through every step of your journey.

This is a bit of a process, but the outcome is unquestionably worthwhile. You’ll begin with a private consultation and learn about our program in its’ entirety. If you choose us to be a part of your journey, our staff will walk you through our streamlined process for retaining our surrogacy services. At this point, you are eligible to be matched with a surrogate!

We are very selective in our matching process. All of our potential surrogates undergo an extensive screening process. After a detailed interview, completion of a comprehensive application and a full and thorough criminal and residential background check, we proceed with another screening phase. Once a potential surrogate passes our screening process, she is medically, psychologically and financially screened.

The surrogates associated with Shared Conception are amazing, strong, caring and committed women. Our surrogates are mothers of various cultures, ethnicities and diverse backgrounds sharing one thing in common: fulfilling their desire to help create families. Plus, they are a wealth of information on the subject of pregnancy and delivery as they are already mothers.

There are a number of surrogacy agencies out there. When working with Shared Conception, you will immediately discover that we are unique, sincere and dedicated to finding the best surrogate mother for you and your growing family. We will eliminate the amount of stress and frustration by pre-screening potential surrogates, and even arranging financial and legal assistance. We also provide consistent psychological and emotional support.

Call us and see the difference for yourself. We look forward to being your surrogacy agency of choice.