Long distance surrogacy relationships

Long Distance Surrogates

Looking back on my two wonderful journeys with Shared Conception, I have had two completely different experiences. Each amazing and unique, I could talk for days about my wonderful relationships with each of the intended parents. For this blog, I want to talk about how the intended parents and I were able to forge an amazing relationship even though we were so far apart.

Before I was matched, Shiva at Shared Conception asked me how I felt about working with international intended parents. She told me about other clients, other journeys, and experiences with international clients. I weighed the pros and cons of working with international vs. domestic or even local intended parents, talked about it with my husband who ultimately told me the decision was up to me. What really got me was their story. And although it is their story to tell, I was touched, intrigued, and compelled to help them. I felt an instant connection the first time I met them, and lucky for me, it will be a relationship that lasts a lifetime.

When we were first matched, we immediately set our expectations for communication. I asked them how involved they wanted to be. Truthfully, I wanted them to know what was going on every step of the way, and thankfully, they wanted to know too! I thought it was important to not only agree on our methods and frequency of communication but also live up to it.

They were so appreciative for every photo, email, text or Skype. Every response warmed my heart and validated my decision to work with these wonderful parents. I was truly dedicated to making them feel part of the process even with such a great distance between us.

And of course, this journey and experience led me to a second journey with another amazing couple, this time local and equally great. The bottom line is that every journey is different. Each experience that I had, helped me grow as an individual, woman, mom, and even wife. I am so thankful to have been able to be a surrogate and include this job on my resume of life.

If you are interested in becoming a surrogate, I highly recommend Shared Conception. Their staff is experienced, knowledgeable, kind and passionate about surrogacy. Give them a call today. Also, you can visit www.deliveradream.com to begin an application to become a gestational surrogate and find out more information!

Written by Courtney Clinton

Media and surrogacy

Media and Surrogacy

There is so much more acceptance these days about having children through surrogacy than previously. Attitudes towards the surrogacy process have changed throughout the years. More than ever, we hear of surrogacy in the news, on the covers of magazines, and in interviews with celebrities. These instances have helped make surrogacy a more acceptable way of having children. However, there are times when the media portrays surrogacy in a negative light, or just downright incorrectly!

The media has greatly influenced surrogacy; in good and bad ways. When it comes to surrogacy in the news, oftentimes, it is a horrible story shedding a negative light on all involved. It does not mention the thousands of families that have been created through surrogacy, or the happiness in successful surrogacy journeys. Many times, the media focuses on the dangers of surrogacy, which are not only misrepresenting surrogacy but also quite offensive!

  1. Not seeing the beauty in surrogacy

Becoming a gestational carrier is beautiful and selfless. These sentiments are rarely conveyed to the public. Shared Conception has worked with hundreds of selfless women who have given years of their time to help create or extend a family for others. It’s not all about the money. Ask anyone of our surrogates. Many have different but equally beautiful reasons of why they became a surrogate. All will agree that their time as a surrogate was one of the most rewarding experiences in their lives.

  1. Don’t forget about the happy families created through surrogacy

The media focuses on the most outrageous surrogacy stories. Many times, you hear of a crazy surrogacy story that is dramatized in a made-for-TV movie, article, or news segment. There are many more happy stories than unhappy ones.

  1. Heartbreak is often sensationalized

The negativity that is reported is rarely followed up with a successful story. This is a missed opportunity to inform and educate others on the process. Education and research are critical elements in a successful journey. If any agreement; whether for surrogacy or another business contract is written poorly, with little education or research, then such an agreement is prone to cause issues.

  1. Name-calling

Negative terminology such as “breeders” or “womb for rent” has been associated with the surrogacy process. These words cannot be farther from the truth and can be very offensive. All surrogates offer their assistance, and agencies such as Shared Conception, make sure that all our surrogates are educated and informed before the process even begins!

Becoming a surrogate is selfless, beautiful, and rewarding. These words are among many words our surrogates have used to describe their experience with Shared Conception. Begin your surrogacy journey with us. Call us at either our Houston 713-622-1144 or Dallas 214-390-4024 office for more information. Or visit www.deliveradream.com to fill out an information request form!

 

 

 

 

what to do with all that breast milk

Got Milk?

Surrogates are women warriors. They help build and create families for those that have faced fertility challenges or are unable to conceive. After birth, the giving does not have to stop. Many surrogates give their breast milk to their surrogate babies or prefer to pump in order to aid in the healing process after birth. Some find themselves with an abundant supply of breast milk and there is so much that they can do with it.

Before formula was introduced, a mom unable to breastfeed, called upon a wet nurse. In this case, so very long ago, it was the only option. Little was known about the benefits of breastfeeding for a newborn – and then the practice was completely eliminated with the introduction of formula. Today, there is so much research dedicated to the benefits and healing powers of breastmilk. If you have an extra supply, there are many babies in need of this “liquid gold.”

Your breastmilk can help save lives. The topic may seem taboo but the safety guidelines and screening process for donor milk can put new parents at ease.

How can I donate my breastmilk to another baby?

Contact the suggested milk banks provided in this blog or look for a reputable bank in your area. Most banks require a phone interview to review your health history, a release form from your doctor, blood work to rule out infectious diseases, and other eliminating factors. Some banks require the surrogacy agency to sign a form stating that you were a surrogate with them.

Most donation banks have milk deposit locations or provide overnight shipping at no cost to you. Many milk banks work regionally and even nationally.

Where can I donate?

You can contact either of the milk banks below in Texas to get started. When you contact the milk bank, the staff will guide you through the screening process. Mothers Milk Bank also serves nationally. The link here will provide their other national banks.

Prolacta Milk Bank (National milk bank)

https://www.prolacta.com

Mothers Milk Bank of North Texas

https://texasmilkbank.org/

Mothers Milk Bank at Austin

https://milkbank.org/

Take precaution

The demand from parents for breastmilk is high. Many parents who cannot breastfeed for a variety of reasons search high and low for this precious food source. The FDA issued a warning to parents recommending they do not buy breastmilk from the internet. There are many reliable milk banks that put the donated milk through an intense testing and screening process ensuring that the milk received is safe for your baby.

Shared Conception can help you get in touch with the proper contacts if you are interested in donating. Contact us, or visit www.deliveradream.com for more information!

Interested in learning more about surrogacy? Give Shared Conception a call today. We can’t wait to talk to you!

 

 

 

 

Pregnancy Then and Now

Pregnancy Then and Now

Pregnancy is awesome. We see glamourous pregnancy photoshoots, celebrities celebrating their baby bumps, designers creating maternity lines, and pampering spa packages, specifically for a pregnant woman. Pregnancy wasn’t always glorified and celebrated. Our mothers had it much differently, so let’s compare, now vs. then.

Finding out

Now: Pee on a stick. Your choice of digital or traditional. And, if you don’t believe the first one, take another, and another, and another.

 

Then: A urine sample from home had to be transported to your doctor. After a couple of days, it was confirmed if any pregnancy hormone (hCG) was detected in your urine. Eventually, the e.p.t. test became the first home pregnancy test to hit the North American market and became popular in 1977.

Diet

Now: Pregnant women worry about their diet constantly—there are lists of foods to avoid that seems to constantly grow. The research on alcohol consumption while pregnant is fairly conclusive nowadays. And, the idea of a woman smoking or even being around smoke while pregnant is shocking now.

Then: Pregnant women were encouraged to continue eating and drinking as they always did. There are even stories of new moms being told to drink dark beer for their iron levels. Perhaps the most shocking is that some doctors told pregnant women to not quit smoking because quitting would raise blood pressure.

Fashion

Now:  Maternity bras and panties are so comfortable, it’s hard to get rid of them post pregnancy. Your favorite brands come in maternity styles, and wearing bikinis is completely acceptable. Clothes that emphasizes your “bump” is sexy! Comfy maternity clothes are even comfier.

 

Then: Trapeze dresses, smock tops and Peter Pan collars were the norm, often finished off with big, floppy bows and outrageous prints. Maternity fashion was like a crash course in dressing your toddler. It was also very unflattering and made every pregnant woman look enormous.

Labor and Delivery

Now: While labor rarely goes according to any woman’s birth plan, there are options. Options include midwives, doulas or doctors, as well as hospitals or home births. There are even options when it comes to pain relief.

Then: Believe it or not, women had little participation in the labor and delivery process. Doctors made the birth plan and most decisions. The popularity of epidurals started to rise in the 80s, giving women more choice in their pain management.

Hospital stay

Now: Babies are roomed in the same room as their mom so the bonding (and sleepless nights) can begin right away. A hospital stay of 24 hours is the norm for vaginal births without complications. For women who choose to have a hospital birth with a midwife, they can leave soon after the baby is born.

Then: It was believed that mothers and babies needed to stay at the hospital, and newborns were often placed in the nursery, away from their mother for about 24 hours for observation. They were brought to the mother on a schedule; mostly for feeding. Dads and grandparents would stare at the rows of babies in a nursery behind a glass window. New moms stayed in the hospital for several days; sometimes up to a week.

Times have changed. Birth is more comfortable and much more celebrated than the generations before. Technology has made it possible for more comfortable births, and women have gained more control of their birth plan.

Why not take the next step and open a dialogue with Shared Conception? Give us a call today and see if surrogacy is the right decision for you! You can also visit www.deliveradream.com to begin an application to become a gestational surrogate and find out more information!

 

Disaster Prep for Surrogates

Preparing for a Disaster as a Surrogate

Preparing for a storm can spare a surrogate from unneeded worry and stress during times of bad weather, power outages and even storm recovery!

As we navigate through this unprecedented freeze in Texas, as well as always facing the threat of floods and hurricanes, making extra preparations will ensure that everything remains well. After all, you have an extra tiny life to protect. Here are some guidelines to help surrogates prepare for the worst.

What you need to know:

  • A pregnant surrogate close to her due date, should have an alternate birth location in mind in the event of road closures or an evacuation. Inform your doctor where you plan to go and how to reach him or her. They may have the ability to refer other doctors, hospitals or midwives in that area.
  • Make a list of important phone numbers, insurance information, addresses of hospitals, etc., for easy access in the event of an emergency evacuation. Write this down in case your cell phone cannot recharge!
  • Have copies of your prenatal care records in case you end up delivering at a new hospital with a new doctor.
  • Try to find a friend or relative that you can stay with that’s within driving distance of the alternative hospital that you’re looking at. They can also help in planning if you stay with them.
  • Make a supply bag, similar to your hospital bag. You can never be overprepared. Make sure to include any medications or supplements.
  • Keep a supply of bottled drinking water on hand for emergencies. If you think your water is unsafe, bring water to a rolling boil for 1 minute before use.

 

Try not to stress out. Stress can adversely affect your body and the baby. Use your support network to unload your feelings! Take some deep breaths and go to your happy place. Preparation in times of emergency is essential. Shared Conception wants to ensure the safety of our surrogates and surro-babies! Are you interested in becoming a surrogate? Give us a call today for a no pressure consultation. You can also visit www.deliveradream.com to fill out an information request form! We would love to hear from you!

 

 

 

 

medications for a surrogate

Patches, Pills, and Prickly Things

As a surrogate, you are required to follow strict instructions from the fertility clinic. They can be instructions about diet, activity levels, or medications. And yes, some of the instructions involve needles that you or someone in your support network will have to administer daily.  It’s really not that bad, and as a surrogate, this is a part of your job. Following the clinic’s instructions and medication regimen can affect the outcome of your transfer.

As the transfer date approaches, medications come into play. You may feel a little overwhelmed! You will receive an array of pill bottles, patches, needles, and swabs. This is the first day of about 10-12 weeks of daily doses of medications.

You will get used to it, and it will become an essential part of your daily routine, but it is a lot to keep track of.

It’s useful to keep a calendar or use the one on your phone to ensure you don’t miss a dose. This is also where alarms on your phone, Alexa, or Portal can come in handy.

Some medications may need to be refrigerated. Still, try to keep them together. This will help prevent any missed dose. There are a few medication organizers out there. Try to find one resembling this https://myvitro.com/products/ivf-organizer – less expensive versions can be found on Amazon. A regular, plain old cardboard box is nothing to be ashamed of either.

The pandemic has not done any industry much good. There have been reports of a low medication inventory. So, if you begin to run low, make sure you call your pharmacy to request a refill.  And, put that phone number in your contacts!

Shared Conception pledges to wholeheartedly support you throughout your pregnancy journey as you help make a family! Interested in becoming a surrogate? Give us a call today or visit www.deliveradream.com to fill out an application request form! We would love to hear from you!

 

pregnancy and Covid

Surrogacy during the Pandemic?

During this lingering pandemic, we have been asked by many of our surrogates and potential surrogates about how COVID-19 may impact their surrogacy journey.  Although COVID-19 has changed our lives in many ways, it is still possible to have a successful journey with some extra precautions to help keep everyone safe.

The recommendations associated with COVID-19 seem to be everchanging, but there is some important information about Shared Conception for you to know when considering surrogacy:

  • Shared Conception is continuing to prescreen and match surrogates with intended parents.
  • We are constantly in search of surrogates. We have many intended parents waiting for a match and are very eager to find one.
  • Final medical screening and embryo transfer procedures have continued since June after many clinics were closed March-May. Professional guidelines have allowed fertility clinics to reopen in June as long as the clinic follows recommended precautions to minimize the spread of COVID-19.
  • Some of our surrogates have traveled for their fertility treatment. Read our information regarding air travel during COVID-19 here.
  • Currently, there is no evidence of transmission of the virus via eggs, sperm, or embryos.
  • The information on pregnancy is limited, but it appears that pregnant women are no more likely than anyone else to have severe symptoms from the coronavirus. Of course, this info can change with new data.
  • Hospital visitor policies have changed. When it comes to labor and delivery, each hospital makes its own policies. In some cases, the intended parents are also sometimes allowed in the delivery room or will be in a nearby room to receive the baby when he/she is born. Check with your hospital to confirm their policies.

Shared Conception will closely monitor the news on COVID-19 and provide you with updates to better guide and support you in your surrogacy or parental journey. Interested in learning more about surrogacy?  Visit www.deliveradream.com to find out more information about becoming a surrogate!

If you are interested in having a surrogate, let Shared Conceptions make your dreams of a family a reality. Give us a call today and we will help you get one step closer to the child you have always wanted. Visit https://sharedconception.com for more information.

 

 

 

 

 

updated terms and definitions

Terms and Definitions – Updated!

If you are contemplating surrogacy, you will find a world of terms that may sound like a whole new language!  These terms are referred to in surrogacy agencies, clinics and doctors’ offices. It can be confusing and intimidating so Shared Conception has compiled a list of surrogacy terms so you can understand what is being said!

IF– Intended Father

IM– Intended Mother

IP– Intended Parent (some get specific to say IF or IM, but just as easy to say IPs)

FIF– Former Intended Father

FIM– Former Intended Mother

FIP– Former Intended Parents

GC- Gestational Carrier (can also be GS for Gestational Surrogate)

RE- Reproductive Endocrinologist

ET- Embryo Transfer

DE- Donor Egg

ED- Egg Donor

BCP- Birth Control Pills

B/W– Bloodwork

DET- Double embryo transfer (transferring 2 embryos at once)

SET- Single embryo transfer (transferring 1 embryo at transfer)

PIO – Progesterone in oil (typically in injection form for most clinics and protocols)

P4- Progesterone (commonly referred to as this when mentioned results of progesterone levels during monitoring appointments)

E2- Estradiol/Estrogen (commonly referred to as this when mentioned results of estrogen levels during monitoring appointments)

HPT– Home Pregnancy Test

FRER- First Response Early Result (one of the most sensitive tests and often mentioned as a top choice to use if you’re testing early)

POAS– Pee on a stick (use a home pregnancy test)

BFP– “Big Fat Positive” aka positive pregnancy test (BFN if negative, but we don’t want to be negative here and highlight that acronym!)

Beta– hCG blood test for pregnancy

EDD- Estimated due date

U/S- Ultrasound

SCH- Subchorionic hemorrhage (common in IVF and part of why we say don’t jump to conclusions or try to worry about bleeding)

CD- Cycle Day (CD1 is cycle day 1 which is the first full day of your period, which you will share with your coordinator each month prior to transfer)

2WW– Two Week Wait (almost never an actual 2 week wait as many beta tests are done by then)

9dp5dt (you can use a variety of numbers)- You can change the wording, but this means 9 “days past” 5 “day transfer” assuming the embryos were frozen on day 5.

PGD- Preimplantation Genetic Diagnosis

PGS– Preimplantation Genetic Screening

 

The staff at Shared Conception is here to guide you and answer any questions you may have about surrogacy. We want you to be informed, fulfilled and confident about your decision to give or receive the most precious gift there is. Interested in becoming a surrogate or finding a surrogate? Give us a call today. Ladies interested in becoming a surrogate can also visit www.deliveradream.com and fill out an application request form. Potential intended parents can visit www.sharedconception.com to get further information. We would love to hear from you!

 

 

 

repeat surrogacy journeys

Loved it the first time? Repeat Journeys

Often, after a successful journey that has blossomed into a great friendship, intended parents will come back and ask the same surrogate to enter a second surrogacy arrangement. Shared Conception has seen this scenario occur many times. We also have many surrogates who offer to carry a baby for another couple after a successful first journey.

Did you know that the compensation for first-time surrogates and experienced surrogates are different? If you’ve been a surrogate before, you can expect to get paid more when you embark on a second or third surrogacy journey.

That’s right — experienced surrogate compensation rates are typically higher than women who embark on a journey for the first time. When you are a repeat surrogate, you have already proven your ability to safely carry a gestational pregnancy to term. You have shown that you can successfully partner with intended parents through the length of this process, and you have  knowledge of the surrogacy process which will make another journey much easier. You’ll be in high demand from intended parents who are looking for a surrogate.

Keep in mind: There is also a limit to how many pregnancies you can have as a surrogate. That includes your own pregnancies. Many medical professionals will set that limit at no more than five vaginal births and no more than three cesarean-sections before you carry another surrogacy baby. While having a lengthy pregnancy history can be an advantage for intended parents, it may also increase the likelihood of complications during pregnancy and childbirth. So, every time you decide to become a surrogate, you must again be medically cleared by a fertility specialist to move forward.

Shared Conception pledges to wholeheartedly support you throughout the pregnancy. Our client coordinators will expertly act as a liaison between you and the intended parents and will make sure that everyone has a beautiful journey. Interested in becoming a surrogate? Give us a call today or visit www.deliveradream.com to fill out an application request form!

 

Intended Parent Support Groups

Intended Parents Supports Groups

Sometimes being on the intended parent side of the surrogacy journey, gets little recognition when it comes to feelings and emotions. After all, it’s all about the wonderful woman who is carrying your child. There are times when you’re waiting to be matched with the perfect surrogate or dealing with the stress of the screening processes and legal contracts, or you’re anxiously waiting for the next pregnancy update from your surrogate — it is not unusual to feel like no one else understands what it’s really like to be an intended parent.

Even if you are surrounded by very supportive friends and family members, they probably don’t have much experience with surrogacy. It is natural to sometimes want to talk to people who have been or are currently in the same position as you. Support from others in your situation is valuable — but finding that support may be challenging.

Rest assured that by the power of the internet, you can connect with others in your position online. And, while the internet is a great way to find connection, be careful when joining an online support group. Just remember, you can’t always believe everything you see online.

When in doubt, you can always contact Shared Conception.  We can recommend resources for intended parents and answer questions about what you read online. We are always available to provide the support you need.

In the meantime, here are some online intended parent support groups:

Meetup.com

Intended parents may be able to find in-person support through Meetups groups. In addition to intended-parent-specific Meetups, you may find a sense of community through infertility centered meetups.

RESOLVE

This is the National Infertility Association and offers a directory of local, peer-led support groups for parents who have struggled with infertility. While many of these groups are not specific to surrogacy, intended parents may still find them helpful.

BabyCenter Community

There are several surrogacy-related groups within the BabyCenter Community, including groups specifically for intended parents seeking advice and support from other intended parents.

Even though Fertility struggles are common, they are often not spoken about openly. If you are interested in surrogacy, call Shared Conception today. Our compassionate surrogacy specialists will help make your dreams of having a family a reality. Give us a call today and we will help you get one step closer to the child you’ve always wanted. You can also visit https://sharedconception.com for more information.